The Power of Connection: A Foundation for Learning in Montessori Education
November 19, 2024

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The Power of Connection:

A Foundation for Learning in Montessori Education

In the Montessori environment, where individualized learning is key, relationships are foundational to a child's academic, emotional, and social development. Maria Montessori once said that "the first essential for the child’s development is concentration," and it is through the power of connection and relationship that this concentration—and learning—flourishes. As Montessori teachers, we must shift our focus beyond academic lessons to deeply understand the role of relationships in a child’s overall development.

Bruce Perry, an expert on childhood trauma and neuroscience, emphasizes that "everything important about life as a human being you learn in the context of relationships." Perry's research reveals that the brain is neurobiologically designed for connection. From birth, humans rely on nurturing relationships, such as the bond between a mother and child, for survival and growth. Relationships provide safety, trust, and emotional security, essential ingredients for a child's brain to develop.

In the early stages of life, children form attachments that serve as the foundation for their emotional development. According to attachment theory, developed by John Bowlby and expanded by Mary Ainsworth, attachment is a deep emotional bond that connects one person to another across time and space. If children do not experience secure attachments early on, their ability to form healthy, trusting relationships later in life—and their ability to learn—can be compromised.

The science behind relationships and learning is clear. Positive relationships trigger the release of oxytocin, a hormone often referred to as the "love hormone." Oxytocin counters the stress hormone cortisol and enables the brain to relax and absorb new experiences, promoting learning. As Perry highlights, the brain's stress response and reward network are directly shaped by early childhood relationships, either in healthy or unhealthy ways. If teachers can cultivate positive, trusting relationships, they help children not only feel safe but also create an environment conducive to learning.

Dr. Mona Delahooke, a leading psychologist and expert in child development, echoes this sentiment, emphasizing the importance of seeing beyond behavior and understanding the child’s emotional and physiological needs. She suggests that the root cause of many behavioral issues is often linked to the child’s sense of safety within relationships. This is particularly true for neurodivergent children, who may need stronger relational bonds and safe, predictable environments to thrive.

This understanding leads us to a critical insight: the relationship between a teacher and a child is not just one of authority and knowledge transfer. It is an emotional bond that facilitates 

learning by creating a safe and trusting environment where the child feels valued and understood. The work of Sara Rimm-Kaufman and Lia Sandilos from the University of Virginia reinforces this, stating that improving students' relationships with teachers has lasting implications for both academic and social development.

Montessori education, with its emphasis on the whole child, naturally aligns with this research. In our Montessori classrooms, children should be seen as individuals, each with their own needs, challenges, and strengths. Building genuine, deep relationships with each child is the first step in helping them open up and learn. Greeting a child at the door and knowing their interests is important, but this is just the starting point. To truly connect, teachers must engage with the child’s emotions, support their struggles, and celebrate their successes in a meaningful way.

As Montessorians, we must remember that the brain is shaped by the environments and relationships children experience, starting from birth. Our role as educators is not merely to teach academic content but to create a relational environment where children feel loved, safe, and understood. These relationships are the building blocks for healthy brain development, and consequently, the foundation of learning.

By fostering these relationships in our Montessori classrooms, we are preparing our children to be compassionate, emotionally intelligent individuals who will contribute positively to society.

Maria Chaffin


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Practical Life Has Purpose!
May 19, 2025
The Purposes of Practical Life in Montessori In a Montessori classroom, practical life activities play a foundational role in supporting children’s development, independence, and connection to their environment. Because children are actively absorbing and adapting to the world around them, everything we offer in practical life serves a developmental need. Supporting Independence One of the primary goals of practical life is to nurture children’s functional independence—the ability to care for oneself and the environment and interact meaningfully within a community. The first plane of development (0 to 6 years) is marked by a strong drive for independence, with children eager to do things for themselves. By the time a child enters the Children’s House (approximately ages 2.5 to 6), they have already made strides toward independence. However, they still require an environment that allows them to refine their skills. In the world, children generally encounter a number of obstacles to their independence: Household processes (e.g., cleaning dishes in the dishwasher) may be hidden or too complex. Tools are adult-sized and difficult for small hands to use. Movements happen too quickly for children to absorb (e.g., tying a shoe). The Montessori environment addresses these barriers by providing: Child-sized tools for daily activities, such as preparing food and caring for the classroom. A clear, ordered sequence of movements that children can observe and repeat. The freedom to practice skills at their own pace, allowing them to move from passive observers to active participants. Supporting the Sensitive Period for Movement We also recognize that young children are in a critical period for refining their control and coordination. So practical life activities are designed to help children refine their movements in purposeful ways, directing children’s attention and energy toward focused, intentional actions. Walking on the line of an ellipse develops balance and control. Pouring water from a basin to a bucket refines precision. Carrying a tray teaches careful, measured movements. One of the most challenging yet essential aspects of movement is control. It takes effort to stop pouring just before a cup overflows or use only a small drop of polish when shining an object. By engaging in these exercises, children strengthen their willpower and gradually master their own actions. Supporting the Sensitive Period for Order Children in the first plane of development have an innate need for external order, which is reflected in their surroundings and daily routines. Montessori environments support this in a variety of ways. We ensure that activities have a logical sequence of steps so as children learn new concepts, they can also rely on the sequencing. Materials are placed in a specific order on the shelves, moving left to right and top to bottom so children begin to internalize the same patterning we use for reading as they work through the easier and most concrete activities to the most challenging and abstract. Montessori activities are color-coded. For the youngest children this means that all of the items for something like window washing will have the same color which helps children keep the set together. As children get older the color-coding is designed to help them grasp concepts like place value in math or parts of speech in language. Once children internalize these structures, they gain confidence and independence, allowing them to complete tasks from start to finish without adult intervention. Assisting with Cultural Adaptation Practical life activities reflect real-world tasks that children observe in their daily lives. Children are naturally drawn to meaningful work—they want to help, imitate, and participate. For example, in Dr. Montessori’s early observations in San Lorenzo, she saw that children were fascinated by the gardener and the custodian, eagerly following and watching their work. Children see adults doing marvelous activities, and children want to learn the skills to participate! Through practical life activities, children engage in culturally relevant tasks that allow them to feel like valuable members of their community. Supporting Orientation Orientation is a fundamental human tendency—we all seek to understand our surroundings and how to function within them. Practical life exercises help children orient to the Montessori classroom by introducing essential routines. For example, we take the time to teach children things that might otherwise be taken for granted, such as: How to carry a chair properly. How to greet a friend. How to roll and unroll a work rug. How to ask for help. By taking time to demonstrate these tasks, we show respect for the child and provide the knowledge they need to act confidently in their space. Supporting the Development of Concentration Practical life activities serve as a gateway to deep concentration. The freedom to choose and repeat exercises allows children to follow their intrinsic motivation and work toward self-perfection. When children reach deep concentration, they experience: Joy and a sense of fulfillment. An increased connection to others. A natural reduction in undesirable behaviors. The ability to repeat an activity for as long as needed also supports children’s sensitive period for order and mastery. This is why practical life often serves as the first point of engagement for children in the Montessori classroom. Supporting the Development of the Will Practical life exercises help children develop willpower and self-control by bridging the gap between impulse and deliberate action. At first, children act on instinct, but through repeated exercises, they learn to: Act consciously and voluntarily. Perfect their actions through self-correction. Develop grace, courtesy, and social awareness. Whether through learning how to clean up a spill or preparing snack to share with others, children learn to control their impulses and consider the needs of others. Dr. Montessori beautifully summarized this transformation in The Discovery of the Child: “The grace and dignity of their behavior and the ease of their movements are the corollaries to what they have gained through their own patient and laborious efforts. In a word, they are ‘self-controlled,’ and to the extent that they are thus controlled, they are free from the control of others.” Practical life is far more than just pouring, scrubbing, and folding—it is the foundation for independence, concentration, order, and social development. These carefully designed activities help children orient to their world, refine their movements, and develop the willpower to act with purpose. By embracing practical life, we give children the tools to engage meaningfully with their environment, take ownership of their learning, and ultimately, become confident, self-sufficient individuals. Contact us to schedule a tour so you can see how young children use practical life activities in powerful ways!